Post-Wedding Update

Phew!

I got married.

Did I really?

Well, that’s what I felt after we said our vows, put the rings on our fingers, and kissed. Is that it?

I felt a kind of tingle when we’re both gazing into each others eyes while saying our vows, but was a little bit distracted when Gemma and my other witness started posing for the camera while we’re in the middle of saying I do, like, this moment has to be captured on camera and people will see that they’re a part of it.

The good thing about having an embassy wedding is that, we don’t have to conform to traditions. After the wedding, since it was still Ramadan at that time, we searched the place for an open food chain to order takeout. We woke up early and no one was able to eat something before heading to the embassy. I woke up early because my eyes were swollen from too much crying the night before, when I realized I’m getting married without my family on my side. So I had to press some ice cubes on my eyes for the swelling to subside, 2 hours before the wedding. The swelling did subside a bit and I don’t know how to put on make-up so I looked like I just woke up and decided to get married and headed straight to the embassy wearing a birthday girl dress. After searching for hours for an open food chain, we finally settled on Marrybrown, went back to Gemma’s flat.

We had to wait till after Iftar before we can proceed to our wedding dinner. So Jess and I started calling our family to update them on our wedding. I messaged my bestfriends on FB and everyone was happy for me (because probably I’m the only one left among the group who isn’t married yet) and I got numerous messages from other people (mostly relatives) telling me how surprised they were of learning that I got married without even a clue. One was even asking if it was just a spur of the moment thing that I decided to get married without informing my family and relatives. Whoa! Getting married is really that complicated, huh? I assured them that I will have my church wedding in the Philippines after 2 years and that they are all invited. Then came the replies of, “Why wait for 2 years? Blah, blah, blah!”

(Sigh!)

Makes me think twice of getting married in the church and inviting all of my relatives. I told my Mom that when I get married in the church, I will only invite a few of my relatives. I will only invite those who are close to me and I will get married somewhere far so that they will not be able to come. Damn FB…

Anyway, the wedding dinner was a blast. My wedding guests composed of friends and colleagues whom I only met here in UAE. I celebrated a very special day of my life with people whom I only met for barely more than a year, while the others I met for only months. Isn’t that amazing? And yet, these people became my family away from home. There was no wedding program whatsoever. Almost everyone has a SLR camera that’s why I didn’t have to hire a photographer. We received a lot of presents including our honeymoon venue. I nearly cried at the end of the dinner. I maybe miles away from home but my new friends made me feel like I’m home.

So that’s it for my post-wedding update. ๐Ÿ™‚

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Stress-Eating

Just when I’m about to get married, I’m eating like a Hungry Bird, ehehehe, lame joke. Seriously. When Jess and I go out and there’s no open restaurant (because it’s Ramadan), we end up going to the grocery store buying all the food we could get our hands on. It’s like going to a buffet restaurant filling up your plate with everything on the table. As they say, don’t go to the grocery store when you’re hungry because you’ll just end up buying food.

After stuffing my mouth with double chocolate chip cookies, potato chips, and sandwiches yesterday, I suddenly stopped and told Jess we should go jogging. We’re getting married in 2 days and here we are, competing on who will look the most bloated on our wedding day. So I dropped my nth cookie, changed into my jogging outfit, and ran like crazy.

It must be stress. Stress-eating? I’m not stressed because I’m marrying Jess. I’m stressed, I think, because ofย  the things we have to go through just to get married. It’s just an embassy wedding, I know. So what am I so fuzzy about? I don’t know. Maybe dealing with a lot of people, having to go through the phase of preparing to get married, or maybe I’m just thinking too much. Gemma said I’m not even having a church wedding yet and I’m acting like this is all too much. I know. Honestly, I’m a very private person. I don’t socialize much. I hate attending formal occasions. Imagine all the things I hate doing, I’m doing now just because. I’m used to being just the audience. Now I’m the center of attention. And that’s what’s making me nervous.

I will let you in on a secret. I have a terrible tantrum and that’s what I’m afraid of. When I don’t like how things work out, I throw a tantrum like a 3-year old kid, cry and act like somebody just messed with me and that you should do something to redeem myself or else I won’t stop crying till I get what I want. If I try to keep myself from crying, I’ll just pout and not say anything until someone asks me what’s wrong and that’s when I burst out crying.

I know, I’m making things too complicated. Tomorrow I’m getting married. My hair will cooperate with me and it will look perfect on my wedding day. My pimples will take a vacation and will leave my face spotless. My dress would still fit me despite the 3-day pigging out with junk food.ย  Tomorrow, I will be the prettiest bride at the embassy. Tomorrow, me and my friends are going to have fun on my after-the-wedding party. Tomorrow will be perfect. ๐Ÿ™‚

Wedding Jitters?

One week to go. I’ll be working 4 days then on the 5th day, we need to go back to the Philippine embassy for verification and confirmation. That’s the day when if a would-be married couple doesn’t appear, it means the wedding is off. Great. That would leave me plenty of time to think. Kidding!

I think everything’s settled. The after-the-wedding party reception is already booked, with an estimated 40 guests. Dress and shoes done. Dinner dress, hmmm, that ain’t a problem. I’ll just wear whatever is comfortable at that moment. A day before the wedding I’ll just have a short visit to a salon for my nails and maybe drop by early morning for a makeover session before heading to the embassy.

It doesn’t feel like a wedding at all. It just feels like I’m attending a prom.

Am I really getting married?

If the Shoe Doesn’t Fit, Make it Fit

I asked him to go shopping with me yesterday. He’s a good shopping buddy. But he keeps on telling me I should go shopping with the girls because men & women have different fashion sense. What can I do? I said. All of my girl friends are at work and I only have 3 days free time to shop. Besides, I’m too picky I’d end up not being able to buy anything.

Whenever I ask him if the shoes match my dress, he’d shake his head in disagreement. “Can I just wear flats?” I asked. “Don’t,” he said. “We’ll find you the thick-heeled shoes” (wedge). “I know you can’t walk in those pointed heels.” Then he started acting like a homosexual telling me he knows all about girl’s fashion.

I was so exhausted I told him we should just go home. But he said we won’t go home until we found a pair of shoes for my dress. I don’t really have much patience shopping for high-heeled shoes. They’re just deadly weapons created to give blisters and leg cramps. But then he found this simple, single strap, ankle tie, white wedges that perfectly matches my dress. I asked for a size 6. It was a little bit loose. So I asked for a size 5. Unfortunately, size 6 is their smallest size. I just wanna cry. Why do I have to have small feet?

I tried it on and walked. It’s a little bit loose but it’s not that noticeable. I guess it will do. I can just give it away to one of my sisters after the wedding.

Problem number 3 solved.

The List

Oh, what the heck.

Jess and I went out the other day going from one restaurant to another to book an after-the-wedding party only to find out that the date we prefer is already booked. Dilemma.

It must be a sign! Don’t invite anyone on your after-the-wedding party!

Right.

So we went to this all-you-can-eat restaurant (as originally planned) to reserve a few seats for our chosen guests (as we decided not to invite a lot of people anymore). I immediately fell in love with the place. It was cozy and a little bit dim. It has a friendly atmosphere and gives a feeling of togetherness. The price was just right for the budget. We could even invite 30 persons. And the good news is, the date is available.

So I already informed my closest friends to save the date. It’s so hard to keep it a secret. I can’t talk to my closest friends when my other colleagues are around asking about my reception. I can’t tell them there’s no reception and even if there is, you’re not invited. Whenever someone asks, I just keep mum and the effort I exert just to explain why I’m not having a wedding reception is so fake one would guess even from a distance that I’m lying. Okay, I’m a terrible liar, so what?

Finally, Jess and I made a list of the people we’re thinking of inviting. The list got longer and longer. Why? We cannot invite this person without inviting this other person. Or, if we invite this person, we’re automatically inviting 5 persons. Or, if we invite this person, the other person would know she’s not invited.We cannot invite the ex-husband and wife. It’s either we invite the ex-wife or the ex-husband. We have to invite her because she would know on Facebook that she wasn’t invited.

This guest list is driving me nuts! Why don’t we invite all our friends in Facebook as well? Aaaaargh!

Jess said maybe we could stretch our budget a little bit more because we’re not even sure if the people we’re going to invite could attend. This is our wedding day and we should be celebrating it with the people who had become a part of our life.

Okay. Breathe in. Breathe out.

I just wish it would be over soon.

We’ll see.

Tying the Knot (Finally!)

I’m getting married. Yes, after 12 years of long distance relationship. I didn’t even think we’d survive that long. It wasn’t easy. But see, the universe has finally brought us together. Does that mean we really belong to each other?

I’m used to us being apart. Now, I’m still trying to get used to us being together. Let me tell you something. It ain’t easy.

Well, I’m used to having my own life. I can go out with my friends anytime I want to. I can go anywhere and do whatever I want. But I’m a good girl, yes I am. So I don’t think he has any problem with it. The same thing goes with him. So the adjustment of being together is a bit challenging, for me. I feel like I’m confining myself to him and I expect him to do the same.

Don’t get me wrong. I love being with him. It’s being apart after being together is what’s making it difficult for me. I’m scared to become the person I don’t want to be. I don’t want to become an obsessive wife. There are a lot of things I don’t wanna become. I just wanna become a good wife, is all.

But let’s not dwell on the intricacies of marriage life because that comes after the wedding. For now, planning a simple embassy wedding is my greatest concern.

We’re having a simple wedding. Just at the embassy. The original plan was that, after the wedding (since it’s Ramadan), Jess and I will just treat Gemma’s family to dinner at this classy restaurant and then we’ll go to Yas Hotel for the night. But since everybody at work knows I’m getting married, they seem to plan everything for me, like it’s already given that they’re all invited. Dilemma.

It’s hard to plan a simple embassy wedding all by myself. It didn’t even occur to me that I will have a hard time with it. All I thought was that, we’ll have a wedding date, appear at the embassy, get married, then it’s all done. We’re husband and wife.

Wrong.

We literally went to every gold store in every nook and corner of Abu Dhabi just to find a pair of wedding ring that we like, week after week, but found none. It’s either the ring doesn’t have a pair or one ring doesn’t fit. They don’t customize rings anymore and the reason the wedding rings doesn’t come in pair is because the Arabs just buy a single wedding ring or not at all. Wedding rings are not a part of their wedding customs. We also had a difficult time finding the right wedding ring because of the limited supply. As I’ve said, Arabs don’t usually buy wedding rings.

We finally decided to settle on a simple, plain, white gold wedding ring and had it engraved. Problem number 1 solved.

Next, we need to find wedding outfits. The Judge at the embassy said that the bride should wear white formal dress and for the groom, any formal suit would do. It’s very tiring to go from one mall to another and try all the white dresses that I lay my eyes on. Most of the white dresses that I found are either too summery, too lacy, too sexy, or too short. I just wanna give up and just wear anything. Heck, I could just wear my white uniform for all I care. Or wear jeans and Converse shoes. I could do that or risk being denied marriage by the Judge.

Finally, I found a nice dress in Promod, have it altered because the small size doesn’t fit. (I found this cute dress in the children’s section once but I’m too shy to try it on because I’ll be the only adult among a bunch of kids inside the dressing room and it would be too embarrassing so I dropped the dress and left). Jess found this dress shirt at Esprit that matches my dress and problem number 2 is solved.

But wait, I don’t have a pair of shoes to match my dress yet so I went to Aldo to look for the shoes that I liked but it was already gone. So I sat there exhausted and realized that I still have problem number 3 to deal with.

Now the biggest problem we’re facing right now would be the wedding reception. As I’ve mentioned before, we only planned on having an intimate dinner with Gemma’s family. But since all of my friends are expecting themselves to be invited, Jess and I decided it would be best if we book a restaurant for our wedding reception.

I don’t even have the slightest idea on where to book a wedding reception. I just want to have a casual dinner with all of our friends and have fun. If I could just book a bar where they serve good food, and booze, with videoke, it would be even better and way cooler than the traditional wedding receptions. But see, it’s Ramadan. Where am I supposed to find my idea of a fun after-wedding-party?

If I could just wear whatever clothes I’m comfortable with on my wedding day, then fly somewhere with my husband after the wedding, that would be super awesome. Then we don’t have to worry about pleasing everybody.

My wedding seems to be much more fun inside my head.